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Speaking From the Diaphragm

The Vaginal Davis Blog

. . .From the Counsel of Inter-Continental Balistic Principalities

Wednesday, August 20, 2003

Hung out with Ms. Meadmore as in Glen yesterday doing girly girly things that ladies of the Hen do. We always have a blast together. She is one crazy Manitobian Canuck.
We went to this art opening of this art damaged kid from England named Doran. I didn't want to go as i hate art openings, but Glen insisted so i wound up tagging along. Luckily we only stayed for 5 minutes. This Doran child is the boyfriend of director Barry Shilts(Wigstock-the movie). Need i say more?
Glen dropped me off at Ron Athey's where i was his date for a formal dinner party at Mark & Hannah's of osseus labyrinth. It was a lovely little affair at their giant West Adams compound. The dinner guests included Phillipe of Montepillier who was staying with Ron but is now at Hannah and Mark's plus Laurent, the cultural attache with the French embassey. I've met him before through Per this Swedish artist. Laurent is gay and very very french in that he loves stirring things up and is mega opinionated. We got in to it a bit about politicx and the like. He was with this lovely lady named Violette who writes for French Vogue and is doing some article about fashion and cabarets. I invited them to come to Bricktops on Friday. Hopefully she'll include Bricktops in her article. She seemed excited when i gave her a flier. I guess her research going to cabaret like places in LA hasn't produced anything of note.
Dinner was incredible with beef, fish, noodles an amazing salad and Violette made an incredible chocolate french desert that was mind boggling. I love small intimate gatherings like this, and last night was perfect in oh so many ways.

.: posted by Vaginal Davis 2:37 PM


Tuesday, August 19, 2003

Oh I forgot to write down that I went to see Los Super Elegantes on Thursday at the Echo Club Nayarit. I haven’t seen those kids play in forever. Of course I went too early and had to be subjected to two dead awful opening bands. One in particular was excrutiatingly annoying, with a lead singer with absolutely no charisma jumping around like he was Mick Jagger with some base player wearing dolphin shorts working every rock n roll cliché in the handbook. Talk about a groan.
It was all worth it though to get to see Marti and Milena’s new and improved band.. Talk about tight, tight and then tighter. They were tighter then my pussy. It was really magical. Allessandro Nivola was at the show. He is the handsome actor who was in Kenneth Branagh’s Loves Labour Lost and Laurel Canyon. He is also in the new gap ad campaign. He’s simply stunning. We chatted a bit and I gave him his due as an eternal beauty.
The rest of the crowd was made up of what is the new eastside. They are hard to describe. There were some cool people but most of them were clueless. I always forget why I’m so anti-social and don’t like going out, and then I am reminded.
Finally got to see Charlotte Rampling in Swimming Pool. Loved it. The young french actress Ludivine is simply ravishing with that voluptuous body of hers and those big fat bouncy titties. Ms. Rampling doesn’t look too scruffy either. She is a classic gorgeous woman. Her hairstyle was similar to the one she wears in the Boorman film Xardox.

Why is it always either feast or famina with me? I've had two TV shows contact me to play a drag queen with a heart of gold, the gay sitcom Will and Grace and some other show called The George Lopez Something or other. Why in the hell would i be interested in being on network television? I don't even own a TV.

I thought the drag queen craze was over anyway. They should contact Jackie Beat----she lives for that stuff.

Oh and it gets worse. My assistant emailed me that Ariana from index wants me to write something with Ron Athey with photos by Terry Richardson. Oh my gawd i can't believe they are going to use a photographer other then the girl that Peter Hailley is bonking, whats her name Letta, or Leta oh it doesn't matter. I'm not interested in working with Index anymore. Besides awful pay, i don't like being subject to the whims of some bougie famous 80s artist who looks like an even blander version of Bill Gates. OK

.: posted by Vaginal Davis 11:22 AM


Monday, August 18, 2003

Saw that french film, "Confusion of Genders" it was very very French. The lead actor was sexy in that skinny Gallic way, even though he was way long on the tooth. It wasn't unbelievable that a young boy calf and a radiant pretty girl would have the hotsy totsy for him, as well as a power bitch wanting his designer baby. I liked the flick, but i'm a sucker for Gaul cinema.
Hung out at the Farmers Market and had a grand time checking out the big footed Tiva sandal clad tourista babes. What is it with those god damn Tiva's? Will someone tell me---quick!!!!
Went to Fubar to check out Jackie Beat's new show. Jackie has lost so much weight that i find her unrecognizeable as both a boy and a girl. I thought she looked amazing fat.
Met up with Lenny & Andrew from the Parlour plus Lenny's frat friend Mike and Scotland and Devin of Maurice's Little Bastard.
I haven't seen Jackie perform since she lived in New York and did an evening at Fez. Her act hasn't changed that much. She still does her amped versions of popular radio hits backed by what i think are kareoke tracks. Lady Bunny does a similar shtick. Jackie is best with her blurbs with the audience and just her traditional banter in a stand-up comic like mode. She is really funny and sharp, just like Bunny.
Her bit about putting other people down to lift one's self esteem was particularly choice.
If i was her i'd drop references to Cher and Madonna. Its just that they are such easy targets, but Jackie's gay audience are pretty mainstream and seem to only relate to subjects that are typical of an urban gay crowd, so it is appropriate for her to stick within that vein i guess.
Ms. Jackie is talented and she wants a mainstream career in the world of showbiz which i don't, but i'm not sure there is a place for her in that highly competitive field. Perhaps as a combination comedienne/character actor. Oh what do i know? She's so ambitious that i hate to see her get eaten up by that beast we know as Babylon the Great.
Fubar is an odd place. It use to be Rafters, a sawdust cruise bar that never had anyone inside. They've updated it nicely. And Bruce that black comedy/actor queen is the DJ. He also has been opening up for Margaret Cho.
After the show i went to Astro Burgers with the Bastard Boys and got a bite, and then we trotted back to my Walk of Fame flat. Devin had never been to LA so his eyes lit up at the Chinese Theatre hand prints and seeing all the hoopla that is Hollywood proper on a late sunday evening. The freaks were out that night.
Woke up early and took the boys to breaky at the Pantry. Really enjoying their company. Devin is nice and quiet and unassuming. Very low maintenance kid---i like that. Scotland is a dear, very bright and full of life. I generally like being alone, but having them spend the night and hanging out with them was a nice summer treat.
I really have to put some serious thought into my lady career. I've been having a blast at the Parlour doing Bricktops, but I'm not exactly thrilled with living in such a substandard manner in a tiny box of an apartment. Bill Silva the producer of Margaret Cho's tour said that i need to get myself out of the Ghetto, and that means my ghetto mentality, and perhaps staying in LA all these years is breaking my spirit and not helping me to grow.
My friends in Berlin want me to take advantage of these two artist in residencies that have come my way. One is for two years and provides me with housing and a small stipend and studio space and the other is for an undertermined time and is quite sumpteous in that I'm given housing in yucky posh West of Berlin, in a fancy apt with maid service and the like, and even a personal driver to chauffer me around. Plus tons of resources for creating great new work and also the opportunity to travel to other parts of europe and take specialized classes in print and lace making or ceramics in Italy or Norway with masters of the field and find new ways to incorporate this into my conceptual art projects. I really need to be someplace that takes care of me and i don' t have to worry about $money at all---just create, create, create
Lyle Ashton Harris had one of these artist in residency and so did Charles LeDray, and this would be the perfect thing to get me out of my funk, plus getting the sexual attentions of cute young boys never hurts.
I adore doing Bricktops, but it really is hard work for such a little payoff, and if i'm going to work THAT hard it should be for me ONLY and for my personal growth and ultimate fullfillment. I'm not getting any younger or cuter, and losing my home in Koreatown after all those years really took it toll on me, so much so that i still haven't been able to fully re-couperate from it. maybe the signs are pointing me in a new more profitable direction. We shall see.

Got this little enote from Kari Krome formerly of the Runaways who is living in New York these days. I love Ms. Kari she is an absolute hoot in a half.

anyways, after a very stressfull blackout weekend here in NYC, I was walking
down the street, and what do i see but this funny looking bird all jammed up
in a windowsill. some people are looking at it and its feathers are all
ruffled up and its beak is open and it doesnt look very happy. is it a baby
owl? a hawk? me being a sucker for animals, i reach in and scoop the little
beastie up and hold him tight. i get a dish cloth and we walk to the vets.
the vet wants nothing to do with it, there's electricity and no fluids so
they cant help me. we call the neighborhood bird lady and our cell phones
dont work cause theres still no power. now what do i do?
a woman comes up to me and announces that it is a peregrine falcon. so i
take it home and feed it hotdogs which i break up in lil pieces and shove
down her throat like i see mommy birds do and name the bird Frankie. so
Frankie is eating hotdogs that I put in its beak, and i give Frankie water
from an eyedropper and she sits on the window ledge which is open, but wont
fly away. she flies little distances and sits on her high perches in the
loft and bobs her head up and down when i come home. and generally is good
company. sometimes she makes high pitched "SQWUEEE" noises when she wants my
attention. yesterday when it rained she took a little bath on the ledge and
seemed to be very happy and alert as she cocked her head from side to side
as i talked to her.
i really want to keep her, but Im afraid she may need care that i cant give
her and may die. and she is a predatory bird, she may one day get larger and
eat my roommates cat.
so today i called the raptor society and am making arrangements for her, and
i am not happy in the least bit about it. i want her to stay with me as we
are becoming fast friends and now i know I will miss her.
i will email pictures later
kk
ps--a big rain has come and all the rotting grabage from the blackout is
stinking up the city.

.: posted by Vaginal Davis 2:30 PM


Sunday, August 17, 2003

Oh my sweet lordy locasta! Bricktops was more Bricktop then ever! Those wonderful Fishnet Floozys really know how to put on a lovesexy show, and bring in a great gaggle of hot humpy men. Plus my cute Mija who use to work for Rick Owens had his 22nd birthday party and carted in a truckload of silent screen sirens as we celebrated Christopher Isherwood with an "I Am A Camera Cabaret Party".
Cuddly Jewish thrombone Scotland Zeif came into town with with Maurice's Little Bastard, two juicemongrols from Olympia Washington. One is so sizzling he has an NBC TV executive as a suger daddina. They did a short piece where they stripped down and basically performed a live sex act. Cuochy Coo! The mostly hetero crowd loved it, because it just came out of nowhere. All the women were just howling with delight. Girls find male on male action very stimulating in the same way that hetero men fantasize about lesbianas.
Bricktops also attracts some odd celebrities. A Pamela Andersonless Kid Rock, was having a dandy old time and 80s hasbeen C Thomas Howell was macking with some girl and boy, and both of them looked just like Rae Dawn Chong. How did he manage that?
Miss Morgan Olsen made me a new sensational frock, complete with jewels and a tiara, which was perfect for my singing "Yo No Soy Puta, Soy Princessa" which really went over well with the rowdy audience.
I guess i'm going to have to wait till Mon or Tues before i hear about what other celebs came by.
Oh and a correction from last week. I said that Bibbe and Sean brought Ingrid Schichy of the Village Voice to Bricktops. Well they did, but she is not Adrian Brodys mom. Ingrid is a daughter of Bilitis. Adrian's mother is Sylvia Plathy who also works at the Voice, and her Oscar winning son escorted both women to the club, but of course i was drunk and got them all mixed up. My apologies for the confusion caused.
***I guess more people read my blog then i realized.

Saturday-Woke with just a small Bricktops hangover. The weather is still in the upper stratosphere, and its driving me crazy. Went to the tired Arc Light theatre connected to the Cinerama Dome and saw Pretty Dirty Things starring Audrey Tatou and a really cute Afrikan man. The movie is directed by Stephen Frears of my Beautiful Launderette fame and is pretty incredible. I recommend that you see it with someone whose kidney or liver you've paid for.
I especially enjoyed the sassy black hooker character and the Chinese coroner.
I've seen quite a few movies just to escape the heat. Went to the Sunset 5 and caughts Boys Shorts 57. I really wanted to see Swimming Pool with Charlotte Rampling, but i missed the first show and i didn't want to pay full price. Boys Shorts had two nice Ambercrombie pieces of eye candy in one of the vignettes, but in all it was very very TIRED. Oh did i also mention i went and saw American Pie Wedding. Of course AP is my guilty pleasure because of hot jewish ingenue Jason Biggs. He is adorable looking, but having observed him up close and personal on a flight from LA to NYC, I can tell you that he is a bit full of himself in that way young actors get when success hits them early. Lets hope he doesn't wind up all Day of the Locust.

Had a bunch of errands to run so then i wound up at the Parlour on Mario's Hot Dog night to pick up some posters. That cute Mulatto Mount Sims was DJ-ing. The music is soooo loud. I couldn't hear myself fart. Luckily the back room wasn't open yet so Lenny and his Frat Bros Mike from Purdue and i got to escape in the Boydello Lounge.
I really like Mike, so much so i lost track of the time deep in conversation was I. Talking to him reminded me that I've always enjoyed my time in the mid west and found that midwesterners and middle America in general isn't always as conservative as you would think.

I've actually had some of my wildest sex bouts in the mid west. Don't let me get started about those hot ginger twins who ditched their girlfriends for a hot buttered threegy with me. I'm such a bad influence on young white impressionable white boys. I can't believe i made brothers commit homosexual insest just to satisfy my perverted, hedonistic pleasure. Well it wasn't like i put a Ms. 45 to their head. Ha ha ha. Oh I'm a very naughty girl and i will be punished severely for my transgressions.

.: posted by Vaginal Davis 12:30 PM