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Speaking From the Diaphragm

The Vaginal Davis Blog

. . .From the Counsel of Inter-Continental Balistic Principalities

Saturday, September 13, 2008

THE WORLD´S MOST GRUESOME MONSTER
An old friend sent me a blog link with an interview with an old collaborator of mine from the 1980s named Tim Hensley. Tim use to have an incredible band called The Victor Banana and they played with my group The Afro Sisters on more then one occasion. I even had a bit of a crush on Tim, that culminated in a little platonic romance for half a minute. I always wondered what happened to him. He was an odd one. Look who´s talking.
Anyway he is now a cartoonist like his friend Dan Clowes, he even did the soundtrack to Clowes´graphic novel Like a Velvet Glove Cast in Iron. Tim´s father is the keyboard player for Neil Diamond. Tim is a genius. The pics i saw of him on the web showed that he is now fat, middleaged looking and married. Will write more, but i am out of time at this tired internet cafe.

.: posted by Vaginal Davis 11:18 AM


Thursday, September 11, 2008

BASQUE INVECTIVE
A New York Times columnist recently emailed me asking my opinion about the young filmmaker Brian Hecker. At first that tag didn´t ring any Gregoriac bell jars, then i remembered that i gave Mr. Hecker the nickname of Beautiful Baby Brian when he first became roommates with top movie costume designer Susan "Crepe Suzette" Mathelson. Suzette really believed in him, and was doing everything in her great power to propel his career in the mainstream industry. I was always a little wary of BBB thinking that he was a user taking advantage of the Crepe´s vast generosity. The cynic in me feels that if an attractive, much younger man is living rent free with a successful older woman in her lavish Hollywood Hills home, he had better be giving her fierce goodies on an hourly basis. Suzette helped him with his AFI graduate thesis film Bart Got a Room which starred William H. Macy, and that flick did well at all the festivals and has propelled him to a place where he is now working on a biopic of Atari founder Nolan Bushnell, that will get released through Paramount and star A-lister Leonardo DiCaprio. The buzz i´ve heard even here in Germany is that all of Hollywood is a-ga-ga. Baby Brian goes through Asian women like cleenex, and you know the old adage: white guy who does Asian chicks is a closet homosexual. Brian collaborated on an installation at my big arts festival Platinum Oasis years ago, and was quite the hornpig. In the big picture window of his installation motel room he put on quite a sex show with a nubile young Asian lass. He was trying to lure an uber humpy Swiss male artist into the room for a hot buttered threegy, but to no avail.
I just hope that now he has become a hot property in LaLa-landia he pays Suzette back by hiring her to do the costumes for all his films. Something tells me that now that he´s successful, it will be later days sweetie! I hope not.
Another old LA pal Julien Nitzberg, who i met when he was one of my Cal Arts Students, has become tight with actor Johnny Knoxville, who is funding his full length documentary, The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia about Jesco White and his family of tap dancing Elvis impersonators. Johnny Knoxville is Julien´s new BFF. Another famous Johnny, namely Johnny Depp will produce Julien´s Tiny Tim script that will star John Turturro as Tiny Tim. I think Mr. Turturro is a little long on the tooth to play the lead. Tiny Tim wasn´t exactly a spring Chicken during his famous heyday in the late 60s, but i think a younger actor playing him would be better, though i can´t imagine who.
***
The other day i went to Frankenstein 5000 in Neu Kölln and was approached by a man i will call "The Beard" who was proud of the fact that before coming to the pub, he downed a whole bottle of Vodka, and wasn´t intoxicated. Newsflash! He was very much intoxicated. Thats sexy Berlin for you.

.: posted by Vaginal Davis 4:23 AM


Monday, September 08, 2008

 BRIEF VON ZU HAUSE
Just received some sweet emugs from some pals of mine in the states. Hope you enjoy them.

o daughter of the sour grapes,
i hear you on the no day job/no dinner trip. i think the solution is hustling,
but without the barnes patheticness. those kind of highways workshops are
pathetic, and even more so when they're gimmicky. if someones serious about vocal
training they need to do time with juliana, not some group singalong session.
i can't wait to travel and get out of here. funny when you think of people who
work hard like XXX but are too cheap and paranoid to enjoy it really... and
why worry about the mrs? as judy says, what's she clinging so dearly to life
for? did you see that peter berlin documentary? he's tooting his horn about
still being alive, then sort of reflects that he's the only one left and not
enjoying the decomposition process. i wanted him to be more interesting but it
was a slice of life.
Ms. Fudge is married to a tall, handsome ginger headed man, very masculine,
who's wrapped up her fat black ass. she's so into it she moved to long beach to
live with him about 6 or so months ago. she's the ultimate late bloomer. and i
don't think she's had anything to do with the mr. dan lot for years, though she
still does her thurs. dirty dirty house club at akbar. she came to the
performance showcase we did, and the little going away dinner party i had for
franko. its good to see her on the high horse.

can't wait to see prof. doyle, and yes that man of hers was tearin it up.

i'll get some pics online so you can see what our students did, heather of toxic
titties got super butch with cars racing around her in a dusty field and did a
fight choreography routine, the dust like heavy fog, dramatic car headlights,
was like dude art ramped up. and manuel did a series of poses naked with women,
and then ended it standing up with this young trannygirl holding his cock while
he took a long piss. and a dyke did a piece where she climbed out of the
skylight in a silver airstream trailor turning into chicken coop, dropped to the
ground, crawled through a trail of dog dukey (with a thick tubing unit up her
ass), and disappeared into a bathtub. dukey, piss, pussy, we had it all.

what else is there really? besides money, drugs, and extravagant fox furs?

warm daddy love
***
Hey Ms. Davis, New York was super fun. the highlite had to be
the sex party in Kenny Sharfs glow room. his studio is this giant
warehouse in Brooklyn, the basement of which he turned into a black
light room with all of his sculptures painted glow-in-the-dark. I
guess he just started having sex parties there, just for his voyeur
pleasure, he didn't take part. I didn't mind him watching as some of
the hottest big dicked twinks in New York showed up for some
psychedelic fun. mushrooms and acid were being passed around like gum
drops. a number of the guys there I'd hooked up with before, this
was not surprising as the gay new york scene in particular is raging
with hormones. There was this one boy I had sex with last year there
who is sooo dreamy, I'm not really into hairy guys but he's sexy, a
true "otter". He's got a really thin and tight built body that you
can tell just recently started growing hair (and lots of it!) every
inch of his body is covered in dark thick woolly mammoth fur, except
for his ass hole which is super smooth. i remember fucking him about a
year ago and it was so perfect- and smelly and manly... at the party
we just exchanged blowjobs because apparently he has a boyfriend or
something now. Later I spent what had to be about two hours drooling
on one of the biggest Jewish penis I've ever seen. OMG it was so big,
the head just seemed to get bigger and bigger as he throbbed harder
and harder... There was no way I could take it on my own so luckily
there were a few others who didn't mind helping. but the party really
got started when 4 of us took turns fucking some super hot
tall hung Scottish dude. it was classic, the guy must have been
holding his load for weeks before the party because he came about
fives different times while we were all fucking him. I came in his
mouth which he eagerly swallowed. one guy really wanted to creme in
his asshole but the scottish guy wouldn't let him. Instead he just
ended up just cumming on his hole which was pretty hot, and provided a
nice juicy lubed hole for me the next time around. after that I was
messing around with some kid who had to be a young 16, some art
student who was obviously there because Kenny was throwing the party.
He was pretty shy but had a beautiful soft penis and his cum tasted so
fresh. We just 69ed for a while and then he fucked me and came in my
mouth. and then even later in the night me and this other swimmer guy
were flip fucking for what seemed like hours.. I've got to say, I am
generally skeptical of anything that touts itself as a "sex party" but
this one really came through. there were none of those old trolls
that usually swarm like a pack of flies to shit at the phrase "sex
party". nope, none of those nasty fat old men rubbing their cocks on
any centimeter of hot young flesh they can brush up against without
asking. Ugh! i HATE that. there were even some nice girls there.
there was a dj so there was a lot of people were dancing and what not
as all the sex happened. as people entered the party they all took
off their cloths and were painted by Kenny or others with glow in the
dark paint. it was a pretty hippie/jungle gesture but ended up
looking cool. and all of our cum glowed in the dark:-)







.: posted by Vaginal Davis 7:50 AM