Speaking From the Diaphragm
The Vaginal Davis Blog
. . .From the Counsel of Inter-Continental Balistic Principalities
Thursday, October 13, 2005
I am so tired of vanity filmmakers, with their tired projects trying to get you to be in them for free. I am a poor person, i can't afford to work for free. And don't try to attach some Mrs. AIDS benefit or now the benefit dejour of Huricane Katrina, to try and illicit sympathy or to exploit.
I don't know how many people have tried to get me to be in this movie about The Pik-Me Up cafe. LA didn't get into the coffee house scene until the mid 1980s way after Seattle and San Francisco, who have always had those kinds of scenes. Well the Pik-me-Up was a little cafe on 6th and Labrea. It was one of the earlier LA coffee houses that opened after the Onyx, and before the huge explosion of sappy LA coffeehouses. I was never part of the Pik-Me Up or its scene. I only performed there twice. The first time when i premiered my band PME when it was just a one-time side project of the Afro Sisters, and then i did a reading with Exene Cervenka of X and her then husband Viggo Mortensen who is a big movie star now, because of the Hobbit movies. I never hung out at the place, i only went once as a customer when Joel Peter Witkin and his wife were in town and after going to Peanuts for Some are Some aren't, the Witkins wanted to go someplace else, and the Pik-me-up was the only place still open after 2pm. So i wouldn't have much to contribute for a documentary. Anyways, the emerging of the coffee house scene in LA isn't really that cinematically interesting or compelling, my spies who have seen this documentary that previewed at the Egyptian Theatre where the director works as a programmer, said its not very good for the same reasons that I've just stated. In fact one person told me that the highlight of the film is my appearance, where i lactate. I never signed any releases for them to use this footage of me in their documentary, so its pretty cheeky of them to include it. I guess Beck, Exene and Viggo, didn't want to participate. Of course none of them would appear in this film, especially Beck who is so esconsed in Scientology, that he certainly is not going to lend his name to something that doesn't do anything for him.
I can't tell you how many emails and phone calls a week i get offering me reality TV shows, or to appear on some kind of talk show, or banal sitcom. I'm not an actor, and i have no desire to be one, so I'm not interested in developing a reel or trying to get exposure, which is what icky music video directors say to you when they want you to come camera ready to be atmosphere in their lame project. Video directors are the worst. i really hate them bigtime---they are known for ripping off performance artists imagery.
So please let it be known to all you fledgling directors with scripts in your back pocket, that I'm not interested in being in your movies. This drag queen is not just happy to be anywhere. So please don't waste my time or yours.
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 11:13 AM
Barbara of Carpenteria cooked a wildly delicious feast for Glen and me. I ate like there was no tomorrow. Always have a great time with my lady Barb, its so nice to escape the horrors of the tired metropolis for someplace with a quieter pace. Barb screened a rockumentary of the odd rock performer Nick Name. Glen is obsessed with this Nick Name character. Of course the reason why Glen loves him so much, is that Nick Name is very good looking, muscular and masculine in appearance. The film was very revealing in that it showed the desperality that overcomes people in Los Angeles in the sad attempt in trying to navigate a career in the entertainment conglomerplex. Nick Name is no different from a majority of other strivers, his story is only redeemed by the fact that he is not very successful in conquering his Morman religious damage. He began his career as a middle-of-the-road country singer in Nashville and his good looks, and decent singing voice brought him some recognition in that millieu. Why he would want to become a punk rock singer is a mystery to me, and even some of Mr. Name's more thoughtful associates. Mr. Name should embrace his fundamental religious past, and settle down in a nice comfortable lesbian crib death relationship with another muscular and handsome man.
Saw the film "The Gospel" with the black German actor Boris Kodjoe. Mr. Kodjoe is one appealing jubas jubilee with a smile and body that is formidable, to be sure, but this film version of a Momma on the Couch Play, was very difficult to sit through. Even the gospel music moments were uninspiring---which says a lot cuz i love gospel music. My guilty pleasure of the week was the Ryan Reynolds film Waiting. I don't know why i love Ryan Reynolds so much, he is cute and has a great physique, but he's probably awful in bed, and is so shwarmy in that post sitcom way, that to be involved with an actor of his ilk, you'd wind up killing him after the very boring sex.
The one great film gem is George Clooney's period piece "Good Night and Good Luck" about newsman Edward R. Murrow. This flick is genius. Everything works, from pace to tone, i almost can't believe it. My only criticism and its slight, is the casting of Robert Downey Jr. who i've never been a fan of.
Been getting a lot of emails from Berlin requesting the lyrics to the songs I sang with my new band Ruth Fischer. When i premiered the musical group at the closing night party of the Poker im Osten festival i said that you should Forget about The White Stripes and Franz Ferdinand, That Ruth Fischer is the the band that is taking rock music back to its most raw basics. Anyway here are the lyrics to our songs I'm a Communist and Iraqi Boyfriend
I'm a communist (2x)
and i work for the CIA
I'm a communist (2x)
not part-time, but everyday
the left is right and the right is left
(repeat in deutchland)
I'm a communist(2x)
and i work for the CIA
i grift i steal i kill i lie
and i like to make little children cry
i'm a communist (2x)
and i work for the CIA
i need a hot iraqi boyfriend
and i need him now
i won't felate a dilitante
i must have a militante
like Victor Mature
a beard and mustache
very long eyelache
the desert song
for my desert man
to live life long
my iraqi boyfriend
This enote from my talented Berlin lover Tim Blue:
Absence makes the dick grow longer, or the heart softer, or something like
that. I miss you, too.
Yes, I think there is a conspiracy to make the entire world tired and
boring, which is why I insist on fun and amazingness to fight the
tiredness and hatefulness. For me, I felt that we were a warrior team,
husband and wife, slaying the Sleepies and trampling them underfoot. I get
so hot thinking about all the tired blood on our hands!
You got a great mention in the monthly newsmagazine TIP. Something about how great you are. (see Marcu for details) AND, you know the cop that freaked out and quit the
festival because our ride was "immoral". Turns out he was someone whose
lap you so voluptuously danced on while I spat blood at his feet!
I just got a note from your daughter, who seems well, Koen is in Poland,
Susanne returns today, and we are starting to get more work offers. YAY!
More later, but know I love you and miss you!
Teem, the Multitanic
and this emug from Marcu Siegel the cheap kolektive's co-captain:
Hey Miss D
so much T, so little tttttime tonight we're going to have dinner with daniela, your husband, and miss kitty diggens, who dearly departs for the states tomorrow morn.Daniela has prepared some kind of vegetarian delicacy, so S and I will take
I just got a mail from Sasha, who's still all dreamy about the CHEAP
intensity period with Miss D. I happened to him too.
so yeah, T and D and I were at the Theater an der Parkaue (the
children's theater in the East where we're doing our Dr. Seuss
installation and where Susanne will be directing her Erika Mann
lesbiana play next year) to see the premiere of Fred's (the IT
lighting gay) new play. Fred did the set this time around. It was
actually quite beautiful, just hundreds of different chairs. We ran
into Sascha, the head director at the theater, and a nice bald guy
who also did something in Poker in the East. He told us the dirt that
a member of the BKA (that's the Bundeskriminalamt, the same force
that sought out Baader and Ennslin and co.---something like the
national police force, a kind of FBI agent) was in IT and was
scheduled to sing in the police choir that was performing in Sascha's
piece. Apparently, this big black drag queen--YOU--zeroed in on her
and sat on her lap during the piece, while your husband Tim,
sputtered anal blood on the secret agent's patent leather shoes!
Afterwards he ran into Sascha, told him he just saw this incredibly
immoral piece, IT. Sascha said he saw it and liked it. The federal
agent said he was dropping out of Sascha's piece because he didn't
want to be associated with such filth. Sascha said that the pieces
weren't associated at all, they were just in the same festival. The
fed said that he nevertheless doesn't want to be affiliated in any
way with such scum. GOOD WORK MISS D!
yeah, and TIP has a section called Berliner Lexikon, which includes
little paragraphs about a variety of subjects organized from A-Z. And
for this issue, you're letter V!: Here's a quick translation. I'll
track down the web connection and send it out to you:
"V Va/gi/nal Da/vis (Drag Diva, Actress, Performer and Event maker in
LA) Should one be scared or happy? This question hangs in the air
when one looks at the almost 2 meter tall black drag diva with the
wide shoulders. Possible feelings of fear disappear as a result of
her warm smile. she is a permanent part of the nightlife in LA, where
she regularly hosts 20s parties in an old bordello. With her direct
manner, she even caused the actress Gwyneth Paltrow to get all red in
the cheeks.Now she's been mixing up Berlin--more exact HAU 2-- where
she appeared in the piece "It happened to me." She also hosted a
small series of parties called the "sonderwirtschaftszone" (special
economic zone). The opening night already had the potential of
becoming one of the hottest party tips in the former West Berlin. The
SWZ partys are now over, but Ms Davis finds Berlin so appetizing
that she has planned further projects. They may have something to do
with a Berliner man who is about two heads smaller than her, a man
who she repeatedly trapped between her legs to kiss. (Jackie A.)"
I'm really happy that TIP wrote something about you. I'm forwarding it to HAU.
Everyone at HAU is all abuzz about Ruth Fischer, the band! Carena,
the theater curator, said it was an amazing performance. That it
destroyed everything about punk music and all that remained were the
questions. She's told everyone about it, so now there's a big buzz.
Gunda, Matthias L's assistant, just called Susanne to ask her to be
in some tired NY perf group's project. S was like, unsure about it.
And Gunda said, just come, meet them and play a song or two from your
punk band. HAU loved the closing night party too. they just sent us
an email and want us to do something for New Years.
ok. dear, gotta get going to miss kitty's dinner. Susanne just walked
in and sends a big big kiss to you. Having you here in Berlin and
working together was magic! It's such a joy and an inspiration.
we all send our love
Ps- i'll write again soon with more dirt about the festival, the lack
of press that others got, about michelle's falling down stairs and
barfing on matthias haase's brand-new yuppie hardwood floor and other
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 10:20 AM