Speaking From the Diaphragm
The Vaginal Davis Blog
. . .From the Counsel of Inter-Continental Balistic Principalities
Friday, May 06, 2005
BARONESS BRENDA HALE
emailed me that she is going to come to my workshop performance "The Maladjustment Rules" at the Contact Theatre tomorrow. The Baroness is the first female law Lord, and one of my biggest fans and supporters in Great Britain. Did a dress rehearsal with a small audience, and things went really well. I had to do one of my nuclear dookies in the dressing room loo, and to rid the lavatory of my unearthly stank,i lit some toilet paper on fire and it caused the overly sensitive alarm system
to go off, with three fire trucks and one police van that came to take me away. Contact Theatre treated the cast to a wonderful Indian dinner--yowza! Andrea came down from London to help me with the piece, thank god i really need him. My knees are rattling and my foot is a little swollen. I'm a delicate creature to be sure.
Feminists Julie Burchill and Julie Bindel both emailed me after coming to Bricktops Friday. They wanted to know when i would be hosting the club again. I explained that i was in Manchester and would be back in Los Ang on Sunday.
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 5:21 PM
Thursday, May 05, 2005
MR ZADIE SMITH
. . .and prize winning poet Nick Laird was at Bricktops last week, with pop ingenue Jonathan Rice. I love getting emugs from the Bricky's kids filling me in on all the ondine, while i'm away.
Well, my manchesty trip is coming to a close. Last night at the workshop we put all the parts together in this piece we've been working so diligently on, and i'm happy to report it all seems to gel. I'm very proud of my workshop participants who are a talented and awe inspiring bunch.
Too bad i can't report success with my gaydar date last night. Thank god i went to meet him at a bar, and not at the hotel. The picture he sent online was from 64 years ago. I'm more bemused then upset.
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 5:37 AM
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
Had a nice greasy spoon breakfast at my favorite city center nook. Ran into Dr. Monica and had a chittle chat with her, also received a phone call from Amelia Jones who was having another margarita party at her gorgeous edwardian home in Chorlton. Was hoping to get-to-gether for some buttery sexing with that giant ginger bmx racer dude, but he was a no show (of course) Andrew of Gould created a profile for me on Gaydar, but i'm finding it a bust.
Wound up taking a stroll and met two pals, one recognized me from when i was on that Ruby Wax special. This boy has a good memory as that was way over ten years ago. He invited me to have a drink and i spent the rest of the bank hoiday with him and his saucy mate Simon bar-har hoping. We went to the unfortunately named Queer Bar, which was one of the saddest twinky joints i've ever been in, with the worse music and young boys who were so affected with that awful half faux hawk, half mullet hairdo that everyone seems to be wearing these days. Even some lesbians had a variation of this coif. You can forgive the young people for such bad judgement, but when i see someone 35+ also wearing this style i have to let out a great big groan.
Tuesday morn emailed my article to Zoo Magazine in sections. The tired computer at the hotel was not working very well and had to finish at the nearby internet cafe. i always have the worse luck.
Workshop with students today will be grueling as we only have a few more days before our performance on Saturday. Something tells me that on my last week in manchesty i won't be getting much sleep.
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 4:29 AM
Monday, May 02, 2005
Got a note sent to me from Los Ang that cute, sexy and adorable Nick Atkinson of the band Rooster was at Bricktops on Friday, and also the first supermodel Janice Dickenson has been coming every week since i've been in manchesty. Now Janice is a good time Sally of the olde school, so i'm sure she's been in riotious behavior mode.
Saturday no workshop so i got to sleep in and have some time to myself. Early in the eve i did go back to the Contact Theatre to see my co-facilitator Joey Hateley's work-in-progress, "Dirty" that was presented as part of a trio of new works. Joey is a handsome young dyke, extremely delicious and talented and her performance piece shows extreme promise. She could become the new Jean Genet. "Dirty" reminded me of Genet's "The Balcony". It was nice to socialize with the cast members of my workshop and Joey's performance.
A giant group of us attacked the gaia village which was very sweet. We started off at Mantos which on the bottom floor was playing very icky loud techno. The third floor was funk musica, and that was great, but the room was like being in a sauna so i couldn't handle it. Then we went to a lounge to drink some more and i got very tipsy, too tipsy for my own good. We then made our way to a little dance spot called Tribeca which was playing some soul and funkadelic---i even danced a whiff. One of Joey's actors has a hot Basque boyfriend who was really turning me on---he's tall, lean and muscular with full lips a pronounced nose and gorgeous hair collick. i was flirting with him all night. The last stop of the evening was a giant dance club called Essentials. The 25 plus group of us sortof split up at this point, with some people going into the danceparty and others going off to an impromptu houseparty. I was following the group to the house, and stopped to tie my shoe and got lost. At this point it was after 3am, so i decided to just find my way back to my hotelry for a good night sleep.
Sunday i spent time with Andrew and Charity's lovely friend Ava. It was delightful hanging out with her exploring the old industrial buildings of the north quarter. She's such a sweet little lass. We then went to the famous Temple of Convenience which is a converted public toilet that is now a pub. Great vibe and some cute rock star looking boys with perfect noses and tight bodies. Ava and i finished our evening at the Gaia Vill'age watching the parade of fools, and then getting a snack at a kabob hause that made one of the best felafels i've ever tasted. yum and yum alike.
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 3:52 AM