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Speaking From the Diaphragm

The Vaginal Davis Blog

. . .From the Counsel of Inter-Continental Balistic Principalities

Saturday, August 02, 2003

Had a long conversation via phone with my good friend Sanchi who lives in New York and got a job working for mediatrix Martha Stewart. He loves his new position, and adores his new boss. He gets goose bumps running into her in the hall and just being in her strong womanly presence is a thrill. He sez that she is ALL business, and a true professional with an amazing work ethic. I believe him. I'm a big fan of "The Martha" I wish i was a strapping, rich white lady. Her life is really glamorous and exciting filled with non stop drama and covuglability. Sanchi also was able to go to her farm for a big retreat, and they had a million types of bar b que and games and an open bar. Now thats the way to run a business. The govn't better stop harrassing "The Martha" or they will have to deal with the Fist of Ms. Davis, and I'm sure they don't want a giant, crazy, no holds barr, black drag queen powerhouse on their case. No sirree.
I hope Sanchi gets to come to LA and visit. He is so smart, funny and wise. His observations about people and things are always spot on. I've known him since he was a college coed, and now he's in his early 30's and just gets better and better looking with that dashing Puerto Rican/Dutch mixture running through his spicy veins.

Last night was Greta Garbo I Vant to be Alone Night at Bricktops my roaring 20s club. Every week Bricktops is different with a revolving door of characters and lunacy. This week two sexy boys dressed as sailors and their girlfriends came by and were they ever a frisky bunch. Really fun loving and mad cap. Just the type of people i like to come to my parties. Sometimes you forget that LA does have some really irreverent people living here, who live life with gusto and don't follow the herd mentality. I guess thats what keeps me living here. I have a love/hate relationship with my city of birth.
A juicy young latin couple came up to me at the DJ booth singing my praises. They saw me open up for Siouxie and the Banchees last year. I love it when someone tracks me down. These cute kids were just adorable, and were parading some hot boy and girl cleavage. Isn't that dear?
Bibbe Hansen and Sean Carrillo came by the club with their talented sons Channing and Beck plus Sean's look-alike nephew Scully. Channing fell in love with Mr. Uncertain, and has a huge crush on him. I could see Mr. Uncertain having a nice buttery threegy with Chann and his lovely Moca arts administrator wife. Everyone loves Mr. Uncertain. He is emerging as an bona fide "It Boy". Well nothing warms my soul more than discovering hot talent. I'm so grateful to Michele Carr of the Velvet Hammer for hooking me up with Mr. Un. That Michele is pure genius. She came by the club and was looking so deliriously sextina! Ms. Selene, my doorlady was also giving some Greta Garbo realness and doorboy Richard cleans up nicely. He really does have matinee idol looks. I have to put him in a movie. Was introduced to this kid named Adam Green who is the leader of some Anti folk group called The Moldy Peaches. He wanted a copy of my DJ playlist. I don't know who else of note was at the club. I'll probably get an email from someone telling who was there. I'm so blind that without my glasses someone has to be right on top of me for me to recognize them. Ha ha. 2nite i'm house sitting for daddy athey who is hightailing out to the high desert to hang with Udo Kier. He has left me a lot of food in his duplex so i'm going to have Frank Rodriguez and his boyfriend P and Shauna Leone over for dinn. I haven't cooked a meal for anyone in ages, and daddy gave me this recipe i'm dying to try.

.: posted by Vaginal Davis 2:51 PM


Wednesday, July 30, 2003

I predict that Joel Gibb of the Hidden Cameras is going to be a mega star. His CD the Smell of Our own is the record of the year so-far. It could be the recording to define the new millinea. I love every song and I play them over and over again. They are now becoming my personal anthems. "Smells Like Happiness" says it all the way nothing can. Its a condemnation of "the gays" but its not shrill its plaintive,

"happy are we when we choose to wear the blindfold
and mark our own day with a parade and a song"

Joel does have a golden bone, and a golden bum. Heís exquisitely beautiful. The best things to ever come out of Canuck, Iím convinced.

Heard a sad tale about a friend whose drug abuse led him to the utter depths of the 90th floor. This queen was a popular hairdresser and was married to a dot.com magnate living in a house up in the high rolling hollywood hills, well he and his husb divorced and he slimmed down and started up on drugs and going to tired circuit parties and got a much younger beau and just became a circuit diva. He had a house in the silverlake, wound up selling it for more drugs and ended up living in his car, which I think is now broken so heís completely homeless or couch surfing. Let this be a cautionary tale. Sometimes I wish I could be a drug addict, but Iím too much of a control queen to completely lose it in that fashion. Iím sure I can think of other ways to avoid reality, but MY reality is so REAL its SURREAL. So I think Iíll stick to legal substances like liquor.

Finally got to go to Clubb Chubb, Seleneí Luna of the Velvet Hammer Heritage Review and Alexí Sunday afternoon beerbust tribute to jellyís, chubbs and their chasers, otters, cubs, bears, brontoís, mastadons, manatees, walrusí, whales, buffaloís and bison. I had a great time. Too bad William Conrad isnít alive to enjoy the spectacle. But that plus sized rapper/actor Heavy D. was digging the action and also Fat Joe. Are they lovers?
Alex djís a great selection of free style music, and it was wonderful being in a club where Iím literally the smallest bloke. There is even a nice group of substance sized women in the mix. Club Chubb which is at the Parlour Club every other Sunday from 3-7pm is the direction for nite life in the future.
Received Pansy Divisionís new CD Total Entertainment. Theyíve definitely gotten a lot better. The production by Chris Xefox is really textured and sparkly. Their years of being relentless and just putting it out there, has certainly paid off. The singing has really improved too. Perhaps if they continue in this direction in a few more albums theyíll have a record that be an artistic breakthrough in all directions.

One of my favorite directors of all time died, John Schlissinger. He had been ill for at least three years. His lover is the Hollywood photographer Michael Childers. Who took pics of me and Ron Athey in his latest book. I got to meet Mr. Schless at that time and it was a thrill. Mr. Schless and Mr. Childers were known for their very kinka-saurus parties of the late 70s to mid 80s. In fact Ms. Thomatha Cruise himself use to partake in some wild shenanigans in his younger hungrier days before becoming the ultimate Hollywood power critch, as well as ultra guarded with his sacred movie image.
My favs Schless flicks: Far From the Madding Crowd, Darling, Midnight Cowboy, The Day of the Locust, Sunday, Bloody Sunday and A Kind of Loving. Too bad he died with that awful Madonna/Rupert Everett film being his last. It was the movie that killed him.

Cesar Vega took me to lunch at that Luna Sol place on 6th Street across from MacArthur Park, The Park Plaza and below the Ashbury. I didnít really want eat at Luna, because the place has a creepy hippy dippy vibe being that its v eg etarian and the dreadlocked black man that works behind the counter has such dirty fingernails, it doesnít seem like he ever washes his hands or takes a bath. For this very reason I havenít been to the place since around December. There was this Asian or latin girl behind the counter as well and she was not featuring me and Cesar for whatever reason. I guess she couldnít decipher the nature of our relationship and it was too disturbing for her. I have that kind of affect on people.
My eggplant sandwich was tasty though. I love hanging with Mr. V. He is so laid back and relaxed, a very low key and low maintenance dude. Later in the evening I wound up going with Lenny the young elder bar scouting. I guess he wants to buy another cantina. We went to Primetime on Santa Monica at Western. PT use to be the gay bar Uncle Billís. But I donít know if its gay now. The bartenders are all Vietnamese women, and there are hardly ever any customers. But they do have a nice parking lot in the back. Last time i was at this bar was when Prof. Jose Munoz of NYU had a birthday party.
We also checked out Hank & Frankís where I had one of my birthday parties several years ago. The place still has that awful florescent lighting. The owner is some old black dancer who use to hang out with Sammy Davis Jr. Maybe he was one of Sammyís lovers. Sammy did get around.

Took Cesar as my date to the screening of the Spanish musical comedy El Otro lado de la Cama (The Other Side of the Bed). The film started off really good, sortof like the Umbrellas of Cherbourg, but then it got a little tedious with the dance moves being very Twyla Tharp lite. I wish they showed lead actor Ernesto Alterioís naked booty more. That would have been a much nicer diversion. Before the flick started we went to the Bev and Robertson Starbucks on Designer Row. Boy has this area changed since the 1970s when it was a street cruisers paradise. Academy award winning star Adrian Brody was walking past and I could have sworn he gave me the eye. He sure is one skinny minny. He looks like a Dr. Mengele victim. These young actor manchilds are worse then the bony ladies with their brittle Anna and Mia bodies and big lolipop heads.

Had an early afternoon date with a secret admirer who took me to the Sunset 5 Theatre to see the movie Camp. Ran into Adrian Brody AGAIN. He was eating outside of this restaurant on Sunset and Fairfax called The Griddle. He was with some blondine that looked like his boyfriend, and again he caught my eye and gave me a soulful nod. I hope Iím not just imagining things. Adrian Brody please stop stalking me. You have an Oscar what do you need a tranny for? After the flicker we went to Greenblatts for some bodacious bagle and Lox. Yummy! Who did i see again but Adrian Brody. He actually came up to me and introduced himself, and asked did he know me? I said no, and gave him a flier for Bricktops, wonder if he'll come? Probably not.
The Camp movie was cute. Not that deep, but some charming young performers who were very nice on the eye. Its sort of like a Fame update. They should have went more the All That Jazz route.

.: posted by Vaginal Davis 4:43 PM